For the better part of last week, my commute home has been particularly entertaining, as the Catholic Guy Show has been on location in Rome for the consistory. Lino (who is usually on during the commute home) has been broadcasting from Vatican Radio and has been joined by Father Dave Dwyer and Brett Sidell from the Busted Halo Show (which usually follows Lino’s show in the evenings). I will be sort of sad to see the normal shows return this week. They play off each other really well, and I suppose it helps that their subject matter (Rome) is so dear to my heart.
Listening to them really made me miss Rome. I can’t quite describe how it feels to miss Rome. Some times I just think to myself, “Ah, Rome.” But other times — like Friday, listening to the show — it’s so incredibly strong. It’s like no other “nostalgia” I’ve ever experienced. It’s not like “Oh, I really enjoyed that family vacation when I was twelve. Wouldn’t it be nice to go back?” It’s different– it’s almost like an addiction, I suppose. I’m not quite sure how else to describe it. A friend once described his withdrawal from cigarettes by telling me he could see himself outside smoking. In a weird sort of way, it’s the same thing. I can see myself there. I can smell it, taste it. I can’t imagine life without it.
I suppose I probably sound pretty weird right now. I wish I could describe it better. But honestly, I’ve never missed a place as strongly as I miss Rome some days. The only things that make it better is to feed it — whether it’s checking flight prices (who am I kidding?) or living vicariously through others (which is why I followed the consistory so closely), or to look at pictures and reminisce with someone.
So it’s time to continue my recap of October 2011.